Like a lot of people, I spend the last few weeks of the year seeking the face of The Lord for what He has in store for me in the new year, and I can say that this time I was overwhelmed. I sat as He downloaded, and felt totally afraid and inadequate to do some of the things He was laying on my heart to do. It’s not that I thought I couldn’t do them, it was more so the thought of doing them on my own, how will I fit it all in? how do I combine it with everything else I already do? what will be people’s reaction? support? acceptance? Fear and vulnerability gripped me.
I can honestly say that these two things have been the biggest hinderance in stopping me fully “going for it” in life, but here comes Jesus!
Last year while on holiday in America, I bought a chronological bible and I started reading it today; Genesis 1-3. OH MY DAYS!!!
Genesis 2:25 ends by saying: And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed (ESV).
Gen 3:7-10 then goes on to say
7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.
8 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you?” 10 And he said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.”
And immediately God slapped me upside my head.
They hid. They felt shame and they hid. I feel vulnerable so I hide.
Adam and Eve only felt shame, fear, and sin as a result of the fall. These are things that God never intended for us to feel. Our sinful state has brought on fear, and shame, and as a result we hide and run away like they did in Genesis 3:7-10. For most of my life I’ve struggled with the fear of vulnerability (and this passes just with sin, this includes with many walks of life ie friends, and just the boldness to be me) that has meant I have hidden myself from God especially when He is calling me to Him, but that is me submitting to the fallen identity that the fall of man brought.
But what am I afraid of? What am I hiding from?
I’m saved! Christ has redeemed me. He has given me a new identity and to still feel the shame and fear that came as a result of sin entering the world means that there are parts of me that still submit to my fallen identity above the salvation of my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.
There was no shame before the fall. There was no fear before the fall. The was no hiding or vulnerability before the fall. I am no longer subject to the fall.
2014 – I’m going hard.
The Lord is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?
6 For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, 7 for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self- control.
8 Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, 9 who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, 10 and which now has been manifested through the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, 11 for which I was appointed a preacher and apostle and teacher, 12 which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me.
Happy New Year guys. No hiding!